Beelzebub

 Want to make a deal with the devil? Want to make a deal with... meeeeeee?


You look like you could use an iron at home. You do have one? Do you have two? Of course you don't. You need a portable iron, so your clothes are fully presentable all through the day. I can give it to you. All I need is some of yourrrrr skin. Just few inches. It's not a lot. I'll take it from your belly, nobody will notice, really. Everyone will be looking at your very ironed out clothes. No? Your loss....

I heard you the other day. I heard you say 'Damn you, God.' You were in the pooper. And you were out of toilet paper. Next time, ask me. I'll send you toilet paper, all I need is just a bit of your soul. A tiny wee little bit. An eenie meenie teensie weensie morsel of it. A peck. Nothing much, I'll just drain it from your sole.. And done. You didn't feel anything did ya? Next time you need toilet paper, just holler.

What about you? You look like you could use some youth. Have the years been running away from you? I can help you catch those years. Cerberus - Spot, fetch! - can run faster than time, and has three heads. One to fetch the ball, the second to fetch those years, and the third to ask who's the good boy. And in return? Let's do a 3-way split. I'm the negotiator, and it wouldn't be fair if Spot did all the work and got nothing, would it? Yes, yes, a 3-way split for the 3 heads. That's how Spot stays young, oh you're a good boy yes you are... Hehehehe

That's a shiny face. That's brilliant, that is. I can see my reflection in it. How do I look? I know what you need - I can take some of that oil away from you. Ooooh, I love it when those bubbles go POP. POP goes the weasel heheheh... And then the bad pus drains away, it does. Then it leaves these beautiful little trenches behind. You want them gone? I can take them away. For a price, of course. Never do anything for free. I just need some of your blood. Plain, old, juicy, type O blood. Yours is A+? Good choice, how rare! A prick, a lick, and o boy, your future looks bleak.

Came straight from dinner? Is that a food baby, or a baby? I know, we know, it can't be a baby. You can't fuck a woman through that belly. Too much? Hey, this guy - you're - clearly rich. That belly says it all about your confidence and your charm. And oh, that shirt, well tailored to you. You're a well-dressed man. That's the problem with this generation. The smart and the rich are not having kids, and the poor are fucking like animals. Do you want a baby? What's your wife's name...? I'll put a baby in her hehehehe...

Oh, I heard a cough! It came from here! You there, you smoke, don't you? Of course you do, I smelt it the minute you walked in. It was under the layers of cologne, under the mint you chew. What happens when you spray perfume on a dead body? You get a perfumed corpse. And you, sir, are a walking corpse. But today is your l-l-lucky day. I can help you. I can add more time to that short timeline of yours. Annnnd done! You won't be winning that lottery ;) Oh and one more condition, all I ask is that you do NOT donate your organs... They're as black as my heart.

Published on
5/2/19 9:28 AM

Performed this in the esplanade. to kids. wow

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