How to mock killing a bird

 A couple with a baby bird walks into a church.


Rockabye baby, in the treetops
When the wind blows, the cradle will rock

"We are gathered here today to witness the baptism of this baby. She shall be cleansed of her sins, her slate wiped clean, for her to begin her journey in this world full of temptation."

The water sprinkles. "In the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit." 

Marybeth is born again. The second rising. Pure, whole, pristine, whole and wholly without sin. Marybeth is currently perfect. A fruit so perfectly ripe that it could be picked and it would fall right off the branch without resistance. An arrow on target for the bullseye. Marybeth is on course for heaven. Marybeth is unlike the parents, who are currently dealing with the temptations of the world. The parents, who are sinners, and who are quite different from Marybeth.

"We are sinners!" cried the couple. "How do we make sure Marybeth doesn't go down our path? How do we ensure Marybeth goes to heaven?"

"Because sure as we're breathing, Marybeth is currently cleansed and ready for heaven."

The priest muses. "Marybeth... who rhymes with death?"

When the bow breaks, the cradle will fall
And down will come baby, cradle and all

Published on
3/4/19 6:02 AM

My favourite piece yet

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